“If It’s Not One Thing, It’s My Mother!” is a book by Vikki Hibberd that heavily discusses the sensitivities of mother-child relationships.

Family relationships are bound by blood but can also be broken over time. Navigating toxic mother-daughter relationships: Healing and moving forward can be incredibly challenging but essential for personal growth and well-being.

Vikki Hibberd’s Take On Toxic Mother-Child Relationships

Toxic mother-child relationships are not just a matter of petty quarrels and few disagreements. Children raised under toxic parents had to endure physical, emotional, and psychological trauma for half their lifetime. That is why the book If It’s Not One Thing It’s My Mother was written to enlighten readers on the impact of broken families, especially between mothers and children. 

The author created this book as a means to break the cycle of trauma, abuse, and resentment that has corrupted many families for a long time. For people who have generational trauma, what it means to have a healthy family often comes as a surprise to them.

What to Expect from the Book on Toxic mother-child Relationships

In the book, Vikki Hibberd discusses how one can identify the patterns within this toxic mother-child relationship. The author often emphasizes the significance of recognizing the repetitive patterns to avoid another generational trauma. We should not pass on it as an inheritance because the cycle will never stop.

Another aspect that the book deals with, other than the cycle of toxicity, is the power of forgiveness to break the destructive cycle. Because of the child’s pain from enduring their toxic mothers, they often feel like blaming their mothers for their projected behavior towards others. Unfortunately, some also use their “mommy issues” as an excuse for their equally toxic behavior.

That is why Vikki Hibberd teaches readers in her book to stop playing the blame game, so no one else can be severely affected by the personal choice of an individual to hurt others just because they were hurt. Part of the things discussed in the book is how readers should try to understand where the mother is coming from and how her toxic tendencies lean towards either physical or psychological in nature.

Common signs of toxicity in mother-child relationships

Given that the toxicity in mother-child relationships can be an ick to some, it’s still crucial to talk about the signs of how this unfortunate dynamic goes. The book If It’s Not One Thing, It’s My Mother! also reveals the patterns so that readers can look at how their relationships with their mothers are doing and if they realized certain things too early or late. 

Toxicity in mother-child relationships can manifest in various ways, and it’s essential to recognize these signs to address and work through the issues. Here are some common symptoms:

Constant Criticism– The mother frequently criticizes and belittles the child, often undermining their self-esteem and confidence. Toxic mother-child relationships often involve invalidation, where the child’s emotions and experiences are often dismissed or invalidated, leaving them feeling unheard and unseen.

Emotional Manipulation– The mother uses emotional manipulation to control the child’s actions and feelings. They making the child feel guilty or responsible for her emotions. Part of emotional manipulation is gaslighting, where the mother distorts the child’s perception of reality. Gaslighting makes them doubt their thoughts, feelings, and memories. Moreover, toxic mothers also use guilt to manipulate the child into compliance or fulfilling her needs.

Other Signs of Toxicity to Note

Lack of Boundaries– A lack of appropriate emotional and physical boundaries leads to enmeshment or overly controlling behaviors. Toxic mothers often exert excessive control over their child’s life, decisions, and relationships, hindering their autonomy. Helicopter moms also lack a sense of privacy towards their children. They always have them on surveillance or go through their child’s phones and other personal belongings.

Conditional Love– The mother’s love and affection are conditional upon the child’s compliance with her wishes or meeting her expectations. Another facet of this is how they compare other people’s children to their own, severely wounding the child’s self-esteem. The relationship feels one-sided, with the child giving more love, care, and support than they receive.

Unpredictable Moods– The mother’s mood swings or unpredictable behavior create a tense and unstable environment for the child. In return, they forego the child’s emotional needs, failing to provide emotional support and validation.

Grab a copy of “If It’s Not One Thing, It’s My Mother!” right away!

While healing from toxic mother-child relationships, the book can still comfort every inner child who has been hurt beyond repair. The author offers helpful insights on navigating this steep and complicated road to healing, which will significantly help.

If It’s Not One Thing, It’s My Mother!” was written so readers can be assured that the topic of toxic mother-child relationships is dealt with due sensitivity. Everyone’s relationship with their mothers is different, and there are countless ways to heal from all the trauma. Begin your journey today by grabbing a copy of this book now!